Marriage is a beautiful thing. It’s even better when you marry your best friend – someone you can always count on. However, while marriage is supposed to be one of the most fulfilling things in the world, divorce rates are up more than ever. Women in marriages are reporting being more depressed and unhappy in marriages than men are. This may sound surprising, but it’s the hard reality. According to psychologists and mental health professionals, depression among women in marriage came down to three major reasons: Kids, expectations and marrying for the wrong reasons.
Yes, having kids can be detrimental to women’s mental health! However, not all women who have kids in marriage are depressed. According to numerous studies, women with young kids have more stress. Why? Because every waking second they have is dedicated to their kids and feel as though they have no time for themselves. If you’re looking to have kids, be prepared for a more stressful life and more of the responsibility.
And even those who may have help from their husbands and nannies, have stress because they end up feeling guilty about being a “bad mum”. There’s no winning here ladies-stress comes along with young kids and teenagers.
Having unspoken expectations
Your partner, no matter how close you two are, is not and will never be a mind reader. Most women in marriages are depressed because they simply can’t talk to their partners and talk about what they expect in the union. It could be how they handle things, how they talk to you or even how you handle your business in the bedroom. All these expectations, if not met always leads to women being unhappy and consequently being depressed. Itis for this reason that before you get married and even in the course of the marriage, women are encouraged to air out their expectations to their partners and not expect them to read their minds.
Marrying for the wrong reasons
As much as we’d like to ignore it, so many women out here get married for the wrong reasons. Some marry because they get pregnant, others because they want a rich husband and others because they feel that time is running out for them. All these reasons, unless a miracle happens, always backfire and that is why women may end up depressed in marriage. Say for example you got married to a man for the simple reason that he was rich and because of some foreseen circumstances, he ends up being broke. Because the foundation of your marriage was money, you realize that life becomes unbearable.
Even though the odds are against women, the bottom line is, a stable marriage tends to be emotionally uplifting for women compared to their single counterparts. In fact, stable marriages reduce depression and improve overall mental health. Does it help men even more? Yes, but what woman didn’t know that?