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Things You Should Know About Interracial Relationships

By October 12, 2020January 15th, 20212 Comments
Things You Should Know About Interracial Relationships
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We see them in magazines, on TV and social media and think they have the perfect relationship. However, interracial couples go through the same problems that same race couples go through, if not more. Not only do they have to deal with normal relationship problems, but they also have to deal with the race issue. Ideally, love should have no bounds in this regard. While interracial relationships are embraced more now than before there are still people who may harbour negativity or judgment about interracial couples. This is just one of the many things that problems that interracial relationships have to deal with. So, if you’re thinking of giving an interracial relationship a try, here are some things you should be prepared to face:

Your cultures will clash

In interracial relationships, because both partners have been raised in different cultures, a clash in cultures is bound to happen. It could be in religion, food and basic societal norms. Unfortunately for you, different value systems can easily cause conflict in this kind of relationship. If what matters most to one person doesn’t matter to the other, the relationship isn’t sustainable in the long term if both people aren’t willing to compromise. A clash in cultures becomes even more evident and difficult to deal with when kids are in the mix. It is, therefore, best to discuss these cultural practices before going in too deep into a relationship.

You will experience negative assumptions about your relationship

Most people who date or are married to someone of another race or culture may experience some stereotyping and rude assumptions. So, be prepared for people to make comments about their kids, their sex life, and their taste.

This is more evident and common in Africa. For example, when people see a black woman dating or married to a white man or vice versa, many people assume that one person is receiving financial help from the other.

Friends and family may disapprove of the relationship

If you are planning on pursuing an interracial relationship, your friends and family may disapprove and be unsupportive of the relationship. Some may react by telling you that you will have it hard in life and if you do get kids, they will have it rough. Rather than angrily labelling them ignorant racists and dismissing them, try to address your family’s concerns.

Be prepared for stares, insults and whispers

People just can’t help but stare at interracial couples. Sometimes they are fascinated by them and other times, they are just cooking up negative assumptions about the couple. In any case, if you are thinking of pursuing an interracial relationship, be prepared for both good and bad reactions from people in public.

You will experience crossed wires

Even when you and your partner communicate, you may end up in conflict. This all boils down to cultures. Different cultures communicate differently. Your partner may interpret what you say and do differently than what you actually mean. This may result in long-term misunderstanding and renewed conflict, and if you don’t open up and communicate your feelings, you may hold grudges, which ultimately may lead to a split.

2 Comments

  • Blossom says:

    Hallo,
    Wow, I like to read some of your topics. I just got a read on this and probably most of what you said does happen a lot. To start with I am a Kenyan born, my mom is Kikuyu and my dad is Masai. I am married to a European man and I do feel that people don’t mention often that being in an interracial relationship/marriage can be like any other.
    You would be surprised at how many similarities you would find in your backgrounds, culture, foods and religion. Afterall you both are from earth! It only depends on how you both are open to learn and add or edit what fits into your relationship and what doesn’t. My Husband’s family is catholic and mine is protestant. Though we are not such extremists it makes our lives easier. I go to a catholic church to pray he goes to my church and prays. By the end of the day your God doesn’t live in the Church, so it doesn’t make us clash in religion in anyway. As for food we enjoy leaning and trying new things, he loves African food fortunately for me. I on the other hand love trying new things. We cook together and we influence our meals with a little bit of this and that. Over the years we realized there isn’t a lot of difference in our foods. Just probably how we prepare them. I mean potato in Europe is still potato in Africa, right?
    Just that probably we would have mashed potatoes at home in Kenya and he would have gnocchi or dumplings in his home country and gravy would be the same with a little bit of this, a little less of that perhaps. By the end of the day we try and what we both don’t like we don’t push each other and there is no judgment in that. We have plenty of foods that are similar, what he probably likes that I don’t fancy I still prepare it for him and nothing makes me happy than watching him enjoy a meal that’s not from my background prepared by me. It’s all about what’s most important, by the end of the day you both won’t starve. But what’s most important for us we can eat just about anything and still enjoy it, because we try it together.
    We do however experience a lot of negative assumptions mostly from the African communities. You would be surprised at how ridiculous some assumptions are for example some Africans’ assume that I am where I am in my life not by working hard but because am married to my Husband. Lol always cracks me up! Most assume that I dress the way that I do because of my husband/or assumption of influence, or others have the assumption that my husband does the purchasing for all my wardrobe spends. Or the assumption that he most probably earns more than I do, or am married to my husband because he is Caucasian (mostly accompanied with the thought of a European passport)….. I am yet to meet Africans without the assumption of “because of my husband” not giving credit to who we are as an individual.
    Other than that, everything else becomes as though you were born for each other. So long as you both put each other first without compromising yourself. Love yourselves first which is what my husband and I had before we got into our relationship. We loved ourselves first and later we were able to love each other. We both had our own, in the sense that I had built my life in my career and growth within me (spiritually and growth of self-love and worth). He had done the same. We both knew who we were, what we wanted in our lives personally and together. So when we met, we realized we were very similar in many ways. How we perceived life. We support each other’s growth and enjoy it. Make sure you know who you are first before getting into any relationship. Don’t get into any relationship with the wrong reasons be it money, power, passport or whatever it maybe. That way no one will be able to brand any assumption (on you, your husband, or your relationship) and it sticks. Nothing said will matter to you.
    In time everything else is just natural….xoxo

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