We recently talked about how hard and messed up it is to date a millennial and that particular blog got a lot of interaction. Since we had talked what made it that much harder to date a millennial, I thought about helping millennials maneuver the dating world better. Here are a few dating tips for millennials.
- Be clear about what you want
Is it a long term relationship you want? Are you looking for a rebound? When you already know what you are getting yourself into, it makes it easier to say NO to what does not align with your needs and pursue that which you feel are okay with. Also, be careful not to get lied to by the other party that it is a relationship they want too just so they can get what they have wanted from the get go – sex.
I know this sounds mundane but in this day and age where technology has made communication instantaneous, people still do not communicate. A lot of things are swept under the rug and subliminal messages are being passed through memes and jokes.
If you want to date and hopefully graduate into something more, both parties have to be willing to put pride aside and talk about real issues to make the relationship work.
- Delay the Sex
In all honesty, you will realize that most people just want to smash and if you do not give in right away, they will walk away. Just because sex has become so disposable does not mean you should go dishing it out. If you want a serious relationship, this tact will help you keep the right ones and do away with the wrong ones. Try this and thank me later.
- Know your worth, then add tax
Just because some good looking lady or gent has started talking to you does not necessarily mean you settle for them. Apart from a pretty face and defined abs, what more is there to be offered? I know many people label themselves as sapios so if you are one, does this person stimulate you intellectually? If not, on to the next.
- It is not a must
Dear Millenial, dating is not A MUST. Just because all the people around you are boo’d up does not mean you should too. Sometimes, you do not want to go on a date with someone or are just tired of the whole thing. Take a break. Do some soul searching. Work on you and your esteem. Dating is not a must.
- The Block button is your friend
Is someone making you uncomfortable? Block. Did he or she make an unappropriate remark? Block. Did they talk to the waiters and janitors rudely and this does not sit well with you? Block. Are they xenophobic, homophobic or racist? Block. Do not wait until you are months into the relationship or even marriage to bring them up. In most cases, this is just who they are and they are not going to change. BLOCK!
- Red flags can be seen from the onset
The red flags do not just pop up. They have always been there. We fail to see them because we want this person so much and we turn on a blind eye. Soon after, sh*t gets real and you say they changed. No they did not. This is just their real self that you were too smitten to see before. If it bothers you now, it will still bother you even after you get hitched.
These are just a few of the dating tips for millennials. Such things as going on proper dates and not these night out partying and pill popping rendezvous. Make it clear that you want to date for possibly marriage in the long term and never be too desperate to keep someone in your life. Whoever is meant to walk away will do and whoever is meant to stay will stay. Also, never assume your position in someones life. Define the relationship so that months in you’re not told “No one asked you to do all the for me”.
What would be your dating tip for a millennial trying to find something serious?