Help! We Have Turned Into Roommates

By August 21, 2020January 2nd, 2021No Comments
toxic relationships

Well, well, well, this one is a tricky one. Can you imagine you and your partner turning into nothing more than roommates? Sometimes you talk, sometimes you do not know. Your sex life is most likely dead and you are just together for the sake of it – the relationship is technically dead. It doesn’t probably hit you until you think about what you have always wanted out of a relationship and looking into it 3 or so years later, what you have is the furthest thing from the relationship you wanted. So what do you do when you realize you have turned into roommates and not romantic partners any more?

  • Where did the rain start beating you?

Do some soul searching and pinpoint where things started going downhill in the relationship. In most relationships, the distance and unfamiliarity begun after the children came into the picture. You will realize that you started growing apart because the mother focused on this new addition to the family and the father might have felt left out. It can also be the man that distanced himself because maybe he did not know how to deal with all the changes happening so fast.

It might have been this one time you caught your partner cheating or in a lie and things have never been the same and now you have turned into roommates and nothing more.

Knowing when things went south would help you go back to the drawing board in attempts to rekindle the love you had for each other.

  • Tell your partner what’s up

Although not common, sometimes your partner has not yet fully fathomed that the relationship is in the gutters. Let them know. Remind them of the good old days that you used to have and how that is no longer an element in your relationship. Make them understand where you are coming from and see if they want to work on things.

Pick your partner’s mind on whether they still want to work on the relationship or are about to call it quits because lets be real, sometimes, there is no need watering a dead plant. You will only spend the rest of your days translating your soul to someone that does not understand your language.

If you both still want to revive the relationship and see if you can still make it work, do such things as breaking that boring daily routine. Routines can kill even the most loving of relationships. Such things as taking a walk or meeting for dinner at a new restaurant will bring back that lost spark.

Also, look into putting in effort on the things that your partner loves. Plan a weekend getaway, get her flowers and chocolates, cook him his favourite meal. Weka bidii.

creating a relationship bucket list would also be a good way to rekindle the love in any relationship. Remember how you wanted to go sky diving or bungee jumping? Get back on with those plans. Activities with high adrenaline will help reignite the passion in your relationship.

Bring back the physical affection. You might have turned into roommates because there was no physical affection or attraction anymore. Work on bringing this back. Hug and touch often. After all, this is your man/woman.

Whatever the case, be sure you are working towards one goal with your partner. Do not be the only one trying to make it work lest your cries that you have turned to roommates will fall on deaf ears.

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