How To Move On After A Toxic Relationship

By July 25, 2020January 3rd, 2021No Comments
Moving on after a toxic relationship

Life is all about moving forward no matter what. It does not give us much time to be hung up on the past, whining about what happened; how you almost got married or how much time you wasted being with this person. We already touched on why it is so hard to leave a toxic relationship and now that we have garnered enough strength to face the door and call it quits, those following days can be excruciating and extremely hard. This is why I am penning down this article on how to move on after a toxic relationship.

Toxic Relationships: We have heard about them, seen them on TV or even been in them ourselves. They are addictive, destructive and the pain they incur could ruin an individual. Here are pointers to help you move on after a toxic relationship.

  • Realize and believe that you deserve love that is healthy

When someone is in a toxic relationship, that is what they believe is love – the beating, emotional abuse and gaslighting. They have conditioned themselves and know no better. This makes moving on a tough tackle as their idea of love is convoluted and broken.

Understanding that love is different and that they, too, can experience gentle and genuine love is the first step to moving on after a toxic relationship.

Rewire your mind.

  • Admit that the relationship was toxic

Once you accept that the relationship was toxic and that it had gotten to an unhealthy point, it becomes easier for you to move on. People in abusive relationships often excuse their partner’s behavior in effort to protect them from their family and friends. Admitting toxicity of a relationship helps one to move on and they will be aware of toxic traits when they are moving on, helping them not fall into the addictive vicious cycle.

  • Remind yourself who you are

Practice soul searching and ask yourself who you really are at the core of your being. Toxic relationships make people lose themselves – go back to who you are.

Stop living in the shadows of your ex. I know he or she said you were worth nothing or you would never amount to anything. That person was lying and belittling you; hurting your self esteem so that you would not get the courage to leave them,

You are beautiful and capable and let no one tell you otherwise!

  • Take practical steps to help you cope

To say it will be smooth-sailing is a lie. It wont because of the loneliness and second thoughts that may come flooding after that. Taking steps that are practical and doable will, however, help you move one after a toxic relationship.

Take a day at a time. Log in your feelings. It is okay to fee sad, angry or even liberated. Take account of all these emotions and ensure that you do not confuse them with facts.

Important Questions to Ask Yourself

Did this person appreciate me? Do they deserve me? Did they treat me the way I deserve to be treated?

  • Do not wait for an apology or closure

Truth is, you might never get any of that. One of the most painful things that come with ending a toxic relationship is the lack of closure. When ending a relationship, many people seek closure in the thoughts that it will help them move on better.

Once you understand that your toxic partner may never apologize or give you an explanation for doing what they did to you, you are at a better position to move on.

Remember that we only have control of ourselves and the desire for growth and change. This will be pivotal in moving on after a toxic relationship.

  • Embrace forgiveness

Forgive yourself. Do not beat yourself while putting the blame on yourself or worse still justifying the things done to you by your ex. Once you have chosen to forgive, you are on your way towards moving on after a toxic relationship.

  • Surround yourself with positivity

Good vibes always. Peg your happiness on other activities that are soul enriching. Focus on your strengths and embrace the new life that you are about to embark on. Shut out any thoughts and feelings of regret, loneliness and sadness. Profess that you are going to heal your broken heart.

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